Learning a New Kind of Love
Mar 06, 2025
Learning a New Kind of Love 
I almost slipped into fixing mode.
Again.
My partner was in pain.
And I did what I’ve always done.
I ordered the balm.
Booked the massage.
Tried to make it better.
Because that’s the pattern:
If someone I love is hurting, I try to fix it fast.
It feels like care.
But under it? There’s control.
Fear.
Powerlessness in disguise.
He thanked me. He appreciated it.
But then he said something that hit differently.
“…But I’m okay.”
And in that moment, something in me paused.
Something softened.
Something shifted.
Instead of asking more questions…
Instead of trying to solve it again…
I just looked at him and said:
“I know. You’re strong.”
It wasn’t perfect.
I totally slipped.
But I regained my center
And for a brief second, I felt what it’s like to love without rescuing.
To stay grounded in my own body
while someone else navigates their own.
To be a sacred witness—
not a martyr.
And I haven’t mastered that.
Not even close.
I still get pulled. I still overextend.
I still want to wrap everything in softness.
But I’m learning.
And this moment?
Felt like proof that I’m getting closer.
Not perfect.
Just powerful in a new way.
A quiet kind of power.The kind that trusts his strength
without having to become his crutch.
And that, to me,
feels like love worth learning 
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