Being free-spirited vs dependable
There’s nothing wrong with being fluid and human, but IMO it MUST be balanced with integrity.

I was planning on meeting with a potential grant writer tomorrow afternoon. She insisted on an in-person meeting and offered to drive to me—super generous!

A couple of hours after we scheduled the meeting last week, her assistant emailed me to ask if we could push the meeting back an hour since it was Halloween. (? No idea what it being Halloween had anything to do with it, but if I could count the times I booked an appointment based on excitement and neglected to check my ACTUAL calendar, we would be here all day. No harm done.

Yesterday, her assistant emailed me to confirm the meeting for Friday and book a location to meet.

This morning, her assistant emailed me to say they were looking forward to my Zoom meeting this afternoon (Thursday).

When I responded that we had not scheduled a Zoom meeting, she said she understood that I was not able to make it to the meeting and that her boss would see me tomorrow.

30 mins later she emailed me again, asking if I could reschedule our meeting to Monday, because her boss was going to be in town visiting her daughter that day and it was more convenient.

I responded back that I was unavailable to meet Monday, and actually I’d like to cancel our meeting Friday also because we don’t seem to be a fit at this time.

Here’s the thing:

We are fluid beings. We get to change our minds.

We get to feel one way one week and then feel a totally different way later. And honor & communicate that shift.

BUT it MUST be coupled with accountability & acknowledgement.

If either of them had said, “You know, I thought that would work for me when we scheduled it, but it really just doesn’t. Would you mind pushing until Monday”, I would’ve been fine.

I do that.

Where I have a ZERO tolerance policy for is a lack of acknowledgment and accountability. That tells me a lot about how the working relationship is going to be.

BE HUMAN. But realize that the other person is ALSO human, also has important things going on in their lives, and just acknowledge that.

It’s a both/and world.